Confession of a Brother

I want to share something here. I’m from asouth Asian country. Our parents are very religious. We are Muslim. I have a younger sister who is two years younger than me. She was very caring. We were close since childhood. We grew up together & watched ourselves going through the changes. You know how it feels when your body and mind changes at that age. Mine was little different from most other boys of my age as I had a sister who was only a year and half younger than me. Well I have to admit something here that we were a lower middle class family considering our economical position. My father used to work in jute mill 10-12 hours a day. Mother was a housewife. So the only earning member was my father and it was hard for us to live when he earned 180 dollars per month. People from US of Europe wouldn’t believe me but this is the truth here. So we didn’t have internet or satellite channels in our home. That was the reason for us being close as we shared more time together than others. None of us had any gf or bf when we were at school. I saw her growing up right before my eyes. She was a cute girl but wasn’t that sexy. But as the time passes by I saw her body changing quickly.

Changing also happened to me but that wasn’t so acute in comparison with my sister. When she was young I didn’t look much to her. But at the age of sixteen, the shape of her chest was so changed that it sometimes got me turned on. I felt wrong about that as I was starring at my younger sister’s body who was always like a friend to me. Even as a Muslim it was strictly prohibited. I really couldn’t control myself at that time. We lived in a two bedroom apartment that time. So we had to share our bedroom. We had separate beds in the same room. I used to study even after midnight but my sister didn’t. She was very fond of sleeping (I’m sorry for my bad English) & used to go to bed early. My parents did the same too. So I was the only one keeping up late in night.

I watched my sister sleeping like dead beside me. She used to wear “kameez” before going to bed which was more like a chemise to me because it was so light & short that anyone could feel her body. She was a sound sleeper. At first I used to watch her a lot in her sleep. I told you she was changed & I had never been with any girl & I was 18 that time. She was 16 & half, 5.4’ & 46kg. She was slim but had a nice chest which attracted me most. She also had a nice back. Watching her sleeping all night right next to my bed, finally I thought I was into her as I’ve never seen any girl so closely. Then one night when she was sleeping I finally gathered some courage & sat on her bed right next to her. I saw her body & couldn’t resist touching that. It should be mentioned that her sleeping body was more beautiful to me. She had black hair which sometimes covered a part of her face. I brushed that away from her face slowly. She looked very calm. But at the same time there was a conflict between my religious belief and my teen aged wonders. Watching a nice girl sleeping so closely from months I really couldn’t control the devil inside me & I started to feel the scent of her body like a dog. The greatest fear was not about its legality or its being illegal but it was if I would wake her up & what would she feel then. But there were no response from her (there shouldn’t be any as I didn’t do anything). Then I touched her lips. Her lips were nice as she was a teen and never been kissed. I’ve never kissed anyone too. When I touched her lips I looked very carefully to her sleeping innocent face. I know her well more than anyone & obviously more than my parents. She was really a good girl & I felt guilty of what I was doing. But that was the first time I was touching a girl’s lips & it was far beyond my capability to control myself. Then I did what I tempted all those years, I kissed her. Her lips were the softest thing I’ve ever touched. That wasn’t a real kiss actually because I just did a lip kiss and it wasn’t even deep much. Then I went down again & kissed her again. This time I took some time but I didn’t put much pressure on her lips because I was afraid of what would happen if I woke her up. Her body seemed so beautiful to me at that time. Her legs were spread apart on the bed. She used to wear shorts under the “kameez”(chemise) before going to bed. There was no sleeve in kameez & her armpit was exposed which seemed nice to me. I rubbed my nose there and did a little kiss on the neck. I took the fragrance of her body. It was sweet. May be she was using some perfume. Her body was so soft that I couldn’t believe my senses. She was my sister. I watched that body lying in front of me for days but never dare to touch it. Her legs were thin and I could see most of it because she didn’t wear any pajama while sleeping. She would only wear shorts in bed. I touched those legs & began to kiss slowly which brought a great pleasure to me. She had a nice waist too. I felt like a hungry dog having a hot meal right before my eyes as started to lift up her chemise slowly. This time she might have felt something & I noticed a little movement in her body. I was so nervous that I left her bed quickly and went back to my bed.

But I didn’t fall asleep. I couldn’t believe myself what I was doing. I felt guilty of touching her lips & kissing it. But there was something going on under my pant. I left the bed & went to her after a few minute when I was sure that she was still sleeping & couldn’t notice a thing. Then I took her left hand & sat there holding her hand for a long time. Then I looked at her chest. Her tits were very nice & nipples were sharp. Those seemed real nice. I kissed on her boobs which were under her chemise. Then I touched those tits very carefully and lightly. I don’t know much English to describe it. But I can only tell you that was the first time I felt the erection so acute. I laid one of my hands on soft body and by another one I was rubbing my penis. It felt the best ever. After a while I thought it’s time to go back. But turning my back on her, I again looked at her sleeping face and I kept looking at that innocent face for minutes. Then I kissed her on the cheek slowly. I don’t know why but I’m sure I felt something for her. I don’t know what it was.

Next morning I woke up late & found the another bed empty. She went to school early. In the evening we were together & I tried to act like nothing had happened. Then for about two months I didn’t sleep at all at nights. Almost every midnight I used sit next to her, watching her body going up and down with her warm breath which really turned me on every time. I kissed her a lot but never went too passionate with that because the fear of waking her up was always in my mind. One night I lifted her chemise up & saw her belly for the first time. Her skin was very smooth. It was just natural. I put my hands there slowly & touched her. That night I kissed almost every part of her body, her boobs, her belly, her back and her thighs but never had the real touch of her pussy. I thought touching it would wake her up. I even rubbed my penis a little over those parts of her body.

After a week or so we were alone in the home. My mother went to the nearby market to buy some daily necessary goods. I figured out that I had a couple of hours in hand. My sister had nothing to do in that afternoon & we were having a little chat as we always had. Then suddenly I told her that I kissed her on the cheek last night (though it wasn’t last night, it every night). She smiled and said “Did you?” I looked at her face & from her expression I was sure that she wasn’t going through any ugly thoughts in her mind.

“You don’t have to do that while I’m sleeping.”

I said, “I don’t understand.”

She said,” A brother can kiss his sister anytime he wants. So you can kiss your sister anytime you want to.”

I don’t know what was going on inside me. I just said,” I love you sis.”

She said, “I know.”

Then I thought of bringing back that moment. I asked her, “Can I kiss you now?”

With a smile on her face she said,” Yes, you can.”

I was sitting on my reading table & she was standing before me. I went close to her, took her face right between my two hands & kissed her such a pressure on her cheek. It was close to her lips. I didn’t let it go for some second & she was so astonished that she couldn’t even think of pushing me away. When I looked at her I clearly noticed a different type of expression & she was looking at me with a disbelief in her eyes. I knew that girls are aware of these feelings more than boys. They even feel such things even before boys of their same age. So I was sure that she felt something wrong this time. But God knows why I was pushing both of us to feel this way.

With a wonder in eyes, she said, “What has happened to you?!!” then she left the room & went to the kitchen. She didn’t start to do household works what she would always do & I knew that because no sound was coming out. My mother came back after a while & I got tensed that my sister would tell her everything.

That night was an important night to me. First I thought that she wouldn’t sleep in this room any more. Then when she didn’t go away after preparing her lessons & went to bed, I thought she would cover her body. But there was absolutely no way of doing that because it was summer & she didn’t have the slightest idea of what I did in her sleep.

I was going through a lot of thoughts that time of what I was doing. May be I’m making this writing boring to you. But please read it because this is what actually happened to me. & may be you can help me out.

That night I didn’t leave my bed. After a few days we were alone in the home in the evening. It was not very regular for us to be alone as my mother was a housewife & didn’t leave us alone many. I thought that could be the time for me to make myself clear to her & to talk about my feeling though it was dirty. I found her in our room. She looked at me and started doing what she was doing. She was wearing “salwar-kameez”. May be she didn’t have any under garments because her chest looked so exposed to me. But I was wrong. She was wearing a white bra.

I said,” Are you still angry over me?”

She said, “why are you asking that?”

I said, “I thought you didn’t like me kissing you.”

She said, “That’s not what you are thinking.”

Then I said, “What was it then?”

She then looked at me & said, “You were different that day.”

I quickly asked, “Why do you think so?”

She said, “You acted quite strange that day. Hope you know that.”

I thought I should say something to make her realize what I’m feeling inside me. So I said, “I just think you are a beautiful girl.”

She thought I was joking. She said, “What did you say?”

I thought maybe it was the right time to flirter her. So I said, “You are becoming more & more beautiful day by day. & you really have a nice body.”

Saying that I thought I overacted & she would probably feel bad for mentioning her body

But she just asked me, “Do you really think that I’m beautiful?”

I said, “of course you are.”

She said, “Thanks. But you should not be starring at your sister’s body.”

I said, “We are friends, right? We can share our feelings.”

She said, “What feelings are talking about?”

I said, “Anything you want to share with I’ll be there.”

She said,” I don’t have much secret to share with.”

I thought the situation was getting cool. So I picked that subject again & said, “So you are not angry with me?”

She said, “No I’m not.”

I decided someday I must tell her what I feel about her. I at the same time I had the guilty feeling of ruining my own sister. That very girl whom I’ve known for years & I know she is too innocent to talk about this type banned taboo feelings. But who knows may be she had that type of feelings too. She’s not that little any more. Sooner or later she would have known this.

I said,” You have become more attractive than ever. You are not that little sister of mine.”

“Then who am I?”

“To me you are something else. You are more than my sister.”

“I don’t understand what you are talking about”.

“I can explain it to you.”

“Then explain it.” She said.

So I said to my sister, “I want to tell you something, but promise me it’ll always be our secret.”

She said, “What is that?”

“Promise me you won’t tell anybody.”

“Ok, I won’t.”

“I’ve kissed you sometimes when you were sleeping.”

I thought she couldn’t understand a word. She said, “What?”

I didn’t say anything that time. I was thinking how I could make her comfortable with these thoughts that I have a definite feeling for her. So I just said,” you really are a very attractive girl and you are hot.”

I thought she ate that. She said, “But I’m your sister.”

“But I’ve told you that we are friends too. & we are not those little children.”

She kept quiet for a moment. Then she said, “Why did you kiss me?”

I wish she could hear my heartbeats. “ ‘cz I like you. You are beautiful. I really like you. Don’t you like me?”

She said,” I like you too. But you are making me confused.”

I came close to her. Said, “There is no need to be confused. I’ll help you out. I always care for you. What do you think?”

“Yes, you’ve always been there for me.”

“Now what? Why are you acting this way?”

With a hesitation in her voice she said, “How did you did kiss me?’’

I felt like I’m the king of the world. Finally the time has arrived to express my feelings to her. So I didn’t waste any time. I went closer to her.

Said, “You should have seen how pretty you look when you sleep. I’ve seen you sleeping all those years. But now you are really something different. Do you really want to know how I kissed you?”

She just shook her head. Then she said, “Was it good?”

I said, “It was the best thing that has ever happened to me.”

Then I took her face between my hands, put my lips closer to hers and touched those soft juicy lips with such a passion that it was really something heavenly. I wanted it to last for decades. I noticed that she didn’t push me away but she wasn’t reacting much so I tried to use tongue. I confess that I’ve never kissed anyone before but I was trying to make our first kiss remarkable. I sighed into her mouth. When I was like sucking the juice from her lips I suddenly felt that she was responding a little. She was so shy that didn’t know what to do & I was okay with that. Our kiss lasted for couple of minutes. Then I looked at my sister. Her face turned red. Then I embraced her, took her soft body into my arms and felt the warmth of her body. Her breath was very deep at that time. I could even feel her heartbeats. There was no gap between us & I could feel her breast which was like soft piece of exposed flesh. The scent of her young body was so nice that I forgot it was my sister. I could feel my hard penis that time. & as we were so close to each other I thought she might feel it in the same way I do. Grabbing her body tightly I was completely unaware of everything. We’ve never been with any girl or boy. This was the first time we came close to a member of opposite gender. We might be brother & sister, but we were human being. Then I felt that she grabbed me too. It was such a mutual thing. So I started kissing her on her neck slowly this time and her body penetrates because I think she never felt anything like that. I grabbed her with all my force. I was trying to feel her. Her body was soft like a rubber ball. Yes it was my younger sister but who cares. May be it was bad, maybe it was blasphemy. But the thought of its being illegal made it even more enjoyable. I rubbed my lips on her neck & shoulder over & over again. Then I started feeling her ass with one hand. May be it was like an armature but it was the best for me. Then with one hand I touched her boobs. I grabbed one of those. You will not believe how soft it was. I pressed that with the palm of hand. I could feel that she was wearing a bra. But this time she pushed me away & I didn’t force her. Her breath was heavy. I could that she liked it but didn’t want to go further because she knew it was strictly prohibited. She left the room but I sat there having a hope that she would be back. But she didn’t.

At least I was sure this time that she won’t talk about it with anyone. So I have to take my chances. I was a good student that time. But these thoughts hampered my studies. I didn’t care much about that. That night when she went to bed I didn’t have the courage to say goodnight. She faced towards the wall & fall asleep. I thought it was quite a day & let’s sleep.

I didn’t give up. What I started doing was trying to seduce her. She was a teen aged girl. Her body & mind was changing. Having a response from my side could work like a catalyst. So I was just seeking for opportunities. One night there was a get together at one of my father’s friend’s house & parents were off to there. It was me and my sister home alone at night for the first time. I made up my mind to do something, it was now or never.

I saw her watching TV. She was wearing her blue nightie. That made her even sexier. I said, “So, are you seeing someone?”

She was surprised & said, “What?? No!!”

“Then why did you act like that way?”

She said, “How did I act? When was that?”

I said, “That day when I kissed you.”

She said, “Listen, don’t you think that what you are doing is wrong?”

“I’m just doing what natural is.”

“This is nothing natural. I’m your sister. We are family.”

I said, “Of course we are. But I’ve found you beautiful and caring.”

She didn’t say a word then. After a while she said, “Bro, do you really think that I’m beautiful?”

“I swear you are the most beautiful girl I know. You are really hot. How did you change yourself? What are you using?”

She was shy. She said, “I’m not using anything! But do you really think I’m beautiful?”

“Of course you are. How come no one has ever told you this? Boys in your class should run after you.”

She said there was nothing like that. I said, “You know that you are hot. I can read your eyes. You really want to feel the changes, right?”

“Well, maybe I’m little changed. But you are the only boy who is talking about it.”

“Because I know you better than anyone. You are a woman now. Don’t act like you don’t understand anything.”

“I’m not a woman yet. But I understand you are too curious about me.” She was smiling.

I thought this was the time. She wasn’t trying to change the subject. I should give her some good dose. I said, “Yes I am.”

Then I wanted to bring some emotion there. I put my hands around her waist. She looked at me. I didn’t look much to her, because I thought it could make me nervous again. I said, “You should not be surprised if I’m attracted to you. I’m the only person who has been watching you closely for these years.”

She didn’t say a word. But there was a storm blowing her out. I said, “Just listen to your intention. Do what feels right to you. Don’t you feel something for me?”

She was quite this time too. I looked at her again. Her body was like a full moon. I touched her breast slowly putting my hands there. She opened her mouth and I just heard saying her “Aah”. So she felt good. She whispered, “It’s wrong.” I said, “No it’s not.”

Then I started kissing her. She didn’t push me away this time. I passionate kissed her. I was licking her lips again and again. Then finally she kissed me. It was nice. We were embracing each other tightly. We were kissing for minutes. I put my hands under her shirt & touched her bra. She was trying to stop me slowly with her soft hands but it didn’t work out for her. I touched her soft tits under the bra. Things were going too fast. I pushed her & she fell on the bed. I jumped over her body, started kissing her on the throat & neck. It was more like licking her. She got excited. This time no stopping from her side. I humped her up, she sat & I was about to undress her. She was like enchanted. She had never been through such type of situation & probably the feelings were good. She made her undressed, took the dress off. Then she took off her bra & for the first time ever I saw her full body. It was amazing. She had a lovely pair of tits with sharp nipples. I started sucking her tits. It was the softest thing I ever touched. We fell on the bed again, she was under me. The more I sucked her the more she was excited. Then I took her pants off. I rubbed my nose on her upper thighs again & again. What a soft body. I came up to her underwear. I didn’t pull it off instantly thinking she might stop me. I kissed around her waist & then pussy. I did that repeatedly. She was excited as much as she could. Finally I was going to enjoy the moment for which I was waiting for months. I pulled her underwear off, saw her tight pussy. She was shaved. Then I started licking it. She was moaning. Her pussy was juicy. I did that for couple of minutes. I forgot to fingure her. Then I took my T-shirt & pant off. We have never seen each other fully naked before.

She was sitting, closed her eyes as she was shy. I told her to touch my dick as it would be nice. She touched it. Oh god….. What a good feeling that was. I told her how to rub it, where to touch & she started doing that. She started it slowly, then it got a little quicker. I was enjoying it like a bustard. I told her to open her mouth, she did & when I was about to enter my penis into her mouth she didn’t take it. But I was about to climax. I shouted, “Take it.” She first kissed on the top of it then she let it into her mouth. But it was only for a few second. I didn’t know why she was putting a wall between us. Then I climaxed. It went out with such a force & I poured it all over on her body. It was the best blowjob yet. She didn’t know what to do. She got cleaned with a towel. Then we lay on the bed. I was naked but she put a towel on her. We were kissing like couple. I threw her towel and started kissing on her naked body again. I sucked her tits & stabbed on the nipples by my teeth. “Ooh… don’t” she shouted out loud. But who cares. I put myself in position planning to fuck her but she made me stop. She didn’t want to go further. We didn’t have any protection. & we were afraid of our parents too if they would know that. It was over for that night.

This was the first time we got closed to each to other in such way. After this I noticed that she was the one who was eager to do this, even more than me. We used to do this whenever we got time. We were very careful about this. If anyone noticed or even got an idea of what we were doing, I can’t imagine what would happen. In our society, it was like blasphemy. We did this for years. Every time she got naked, letting herself to be kissed & finger fucked. She gave me blowjob. But there was always regret that I’ve never had sex with her. I mean what real sex is, had never been done. I didn’t take her virginity. When I got myself admitted in college, I became very busy with studies. There wasn’t enough time to share with my sister. She got herself a boy friend. But it was her bad luck that thing got exposed & ours was a very conservative family. It was hard for her to continue that relationship. They broke in a few months. But the thought of herself got banged by someone else is always giving me pain. Last time it was 2009 when we came close to each other. Had a little fun being naked, kissing each other & trying to act like we were couple. She gave me blowjob first, thinking that I would not be able to do her after that. But I was about to have sex with her & again she didn’t want us to do that. I could have insisted her, but I didn’t. Still now it gives me pain that I didn’t have sex with her. Now it’s almost over. I’m studying B.Sc. Engineering & she has finished her college education. I think I can still seduce her if I want to. Should I do it??? Because I can’t think of anyone having sex with my sister. May be I’m in love with her. I think she loves me too. When we meet, talk like nothing has happened. One year earlier, she was injured in a car accident. I did as much as I could to take care of her. She is grateful to that. I know she wants to have sex with me. Because after having fun for the first time, she used to call me first to have some fun. I’m in a fix right now. Tell me what should I do?? My sister is about 21 now. She has a perfect body now. She knows that I notice her a lot, but doesn’t do anything to keep herself away from me. I think she loves it as I watch her. Should I do it for one more time?? I don’t think I should be feeling guilty for wanting my sister…